But Is It Safe? (05-25-2007)

I started a blog at Blogger because I changed email addresses and forgot my password at Wordpress. Most of the stuff I've written over the years is kind of dumb, but some of it might be worth preserving. I'm copying it over here so that when I forget my login info again, I can just copy it from this one place.

Amelia has surgery coming up and we are quite nervous.  She is slated to have a selective dorsal rhizotomy on August 1st, and, though the success rate is quite high, I get scared thinking of the implications of a slight misstep when work is done on the spinal cord.
  
From what I understand (which isn’t much), the surgeon(s) will make a small incision on her back to remove some of the sensory nerves in her legs.  Apparently there is some sort of sensory over-spill, such that the sensation of one leg is being felt (sensed?) in the other, which would explain much of her stiffness and spacisity…each leg “wants” to respond to what the other one feels. 

Amelia is supposed to be a prime candidate for this surgery, but it is still nerve wracking and the logistical implications are overwhelming when I think about them for too long.   The recovery process will include therapy two times a day (on weekdays) for up to four months, and then once a day for up to a year.   In the meantime, we would like to enroll her in a kindergarten program next year.   There is a private, Christian school on the same road as the hospital at which she would have therapy, so a half-day program (between therapies) there would be ideal.  We have yet to hear back about any openings, though. 

Once she has had surgery, she will no longer be on her Baclofen “Yucky pills” (which eases the muscle stiffness), which I think will be a good thing, because she seems to be developing a dependency on those.  I am also hopeful because of the high success rate of this operation, and all of Amelia’s therapists’ comments that she is such a hard worker with great enthusiasm and dedication.  I am hoping this will be the thing that gets her walking (ideally unaided eventually, or at least with quad canes or something similar), but I am also a natural pessimist who worries that this will end up being a lot of trouble for little or no results.  Also, I feel like we have somewhat reached the end of our metaphorical rope, so if this fails, I don’t know what else we will be left with to try. 

Through all of this, I know that God is faithful, and I know that He works all things for His glory and for the good those whom He loves.  I may have my own desires and agendas, but through disappointments and pleasant surprises I must remember that (as C.S. Lewis reminds us…indirectly) He’s good, and He’s the King.